If you’re a strap-on enthusiast who’s looking for a willing and enthusiastic partner to help you realize your pegging fantasies, you’re far from alone. Perhaps you’re new to strap-on sex. Maybe you’ve just relocated and you’re trying to get a fix on your new town’s scene. Maybe you’re just in between relationships. We’ve all been there and odds are, we’ll be there again. In the meantime, let’s try to make your hunt for a new strap-on dildo play partner more productive and successful.

Personals can be useful, but this method of finding a strap-on partner comes with a whopping caveat emptor. In the wonderful world of Internet personals, every man has a nine inch dick and every woman… well, you know the drill. Targeted personals are your best bet for finding a strap-on partner, so look for sites that specifically cater to finely tuned sensual tastes. Be honest about your looks and your likes in your ad—even if you’re just trying to find her to have a strap-on partner, you want to be with somebody who’s not batshit insane. When you finally meet somebody you decide you want to hook up with, keep the first meeting casual and make sure that it’s someplace public and that your friends know where you are. Better safe, you know what I mean?

Another option is to get into the loop of the area’s swinger community. Frequent clubs that cater to open-minded folks—you might begin to build a circle of friends that include women into strap-on sex that way, or that might be your entry to swingers’ gatherings, BDSM parties, and the like. Those events tend to attract people who are into strap-on play, so you just might meet your strap-on dildo angel through that vector.

Meeting people, even women who are into strap-on sex, is easy when you get out and circulate. Get to know your community, through cyberspace, by hitting local clubs and events, or both, and before long, you’ll find yourself with a strap-on ladyfriend who’ll gladly turn you into her bend-over boyfriend.